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It All Started With A 3600 Mile Bicycle Trek Across the USA

When I was 16, I took a one-way flight to Seattle and biked my way home through an adventure program for teens. I had spent the previous year training for the trip, raising money to pay for it, and convincing my parents to let me go.

For two months, I rode across the country with six other teenagers and two team leaders— both under 22. We had no cell phones, no support vehicle, and no Google Maps. We carried everything we needed on our bikes and slept on the ground in city parks, campgrounds, and sometimes in the backyards of people we had just met.

Each night, our team leaders sketched the next day’s route on a paper map. During the day we spread out as solo riders, sometimes biking more than 100 miles. Looking back, it’s a miracle I didn’t get lost— I never carried my own map and simply trusted that my team leaders would be waiting for me at the next turn in the road.

Over 3,600 miles, I pedaled through some of the most beautiful landscapes in America.

I also rode through pounding wind and rain, had a gun pulled on me while passing someone’s yard, nearly got run off the road by a logging truck, and woke up one night to two fugitives literally tripping over our tents as they fled from the police.

That journey taught me discipline, endurance, and something even more important: the confidence that I could do hard things.

It All Started With A 3600 Mile Bicycle Trek

When I was 16, I took a one-way flight to Seattle and biked my way home through an adventure program for teens. I had spent much of the previous year training for the trip, raising money to pay for it, and getting permission to go. 

I bicycled for two months alongside 6 teenagers and 2 team leaders, who were both under the age of 22. We had no cell phones, no support vehicle, and no google maps. We carried all our supplies, and slept on the ground in city parks, campgrounds, and in the backyards of people we had just met. Our team leaders would outline our daily route on a map the night before, and then we would spread out as solo riders during the day - sometimes biking over 100 miles. Looking back, it was a miracle I didn't get lost because I never carried my own map and trusted that someone would be waiting for me at the next turn in the road.

During that 3600 mile ride, I peddled through some of the most beautiful landscapes in America. 

I also muddled through miles of heavy wind and rain, had a gun pulled on me as I cycled past someone's yard, almost got mowed down by a logging truck, and even experienced two fugitives tripping over our tent in the middle of the night while they were fleeing from the police. 

This adventure helped me develop the discipline and stamina to do hard things, and also the confidence to do more of them.

A POSTCARD I WROTE AT 16

"Right now, we're in Williston, North Dakota. Yesterday we completed 117 miles! We had to make up for the horrendous headwinds. Ryan said that they were 30-40 miles per hour! When people talk about road rage, they don't know what they're talking about. I mean my knees felt like they were going to fall off! All I wanted to do was sit on the side of the road and cry. It was incredibly frustrating to bike and bike and never get any closer to the horizon. It took two hours to bike seven miles. This is a really tough trip! But I'm glad I'm doing it. I haven't showered in about a week. I'm dirty and scuzzy. My knees are swollen and sore. But when I'm through with this, I'll feel like I can do anything if I set my mind to it. Because I can! And I am!!"

Grit & Adventure Became My Way of Being in The World

After that 3600 mile bike trip, my adventurous spirit cracked open. From ages 16 to 18, I volunteered at a boys’ orphanage in a remote area of Brazil; learned to use a blow torch in the wind while building roofs on a Hopi mesa; and helped build houses in a migrant workers’ camp in Florida. In college, as an ecology student, I conducted underwater research in Mexico and Belize, and backpacked on glaciers in the Alaskan backcountry. I also traveled to one of the poorest areas of India to study Buddhism and experience the Kalachakra Initiation with HH the Dalai Lama.

#metoo

Little Did I Know That These Trips Were Emotional Defenses

One year before my bike trek, at the age of 15, I had my first #metoo experience. I was sexually assaulted and robbed in a group attack. I told no one. Since I didn't have the tools to process that experience at the time, my adventures became an important emotional defense against feeling that pain. Here are some other emotional defenses people use when they're feeling overwhelmed:

 

Defenses Turn You Into A Pressure Cooker

(( Eventually you blow up! ))

It All Exploded During Pandemic Isolation

During the pandemic, I found myself starting over in a small town in North Carolina, far away from my Connecticut roots. Alone with my cat and grieving the unexpected deaths of several loved ones, I was forced to expand my emotion vocabulary and learn practical tools for soothing myself.

OVER A PERIOD OF 5 YEARS

I Expanded My Emotion Vocabulary

OVER A PERIOD OF 5 YEARS

I Expanded My Emotion Vocabulary

A Glimmer Practice is What Made ALL the Difference

 A glimmer is the opposite of a trigger.

It's a micro-moment of gratitude, awe, or cozy-comfort which sparks a sense of safety. A glimmer won’t erase your problems, but it’ll create a tiny moment of relief, which can sometimes make all the difference.

Start A Glimmer Practice

I'd Been Collecting Glimmers for Years Without Realizing It

Back in 2011, I began asking the public to share their gratitude with me on postcards. Within a month of launching this public art campaign, I had received so many postcards that the campaign  was featured on NPR… and within three years, so many people wanted to participate that I had incorporated the effort into a nonprofit called Look for the Good Project. Here's a video that was created back in 2013, before the nonprofit was established.

 
COMMUNITY GLIMMERS

Glimmers Help You Access the Steady Part of Your Nervous System

My Glimmer Practice Gently Melted My Defenses

Years of collecting gratitude through the Look for the Good Project had quietly trained my nervous system to notice glimmers. These small signals of comfort and safety allowed my nervous system to soften. And in that softening, something important began to happen: The defenses I had built over decades slowly started to melt. In the process, I created Activate Your Strength®— a body of work designed to help people understand their nervous system, expand their emotional vocabulary, and practice simple ways to transform their stress into strength.

Activate Your Strength

My Mission

To make mental health fun. 

I use cartoons to simplify complex ideas in psychology and make them more accessible to the public. I believe this is an effective way to increase kindness and care within communities and disrupt cycles of intergenerational trauma.

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My Life Mission

Make mental health fun. 

I use cartoons to simplify complex ideas in psychology and make them more accessible to the public. I believe this is an effective way to improve emotional literacy within communities and disrupt cycles of intergenerational trauma.

Connect on LinkedIn

I Do This Work in Loving Memory Of:

Ruth Robins

Debbie Goodrow

My Grandma

Edna & Doug Noiles